Annie's Haven

Reasons Why You Need To Set Boundaries With Toxic Family Members

You might think that it is not that bad to cross someone else’s boundaries. Or perhaps you think it is not a big deal because it is not going to harm them. Maybe you believe that because you are close to specific people, it is okay to emotionally and mentally hurt them. You’re mistaken. Whether intentional or unintentional, the damage you cause to people can stay for a more extended period. And that is vice versa.

When you often feel misunderstood and ignored, it is essential to realize that there is something wrong. As a human, it is your natural desire to point out that not all things are acceptable. If a particular action, words, and behavior hurt you physically, emotionally, and mentally, you need to stop it. That is, even if you resort to ending your relationship with them. Despite an inherently deep connection, you think you have with these people, you need to look out for yourself.

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Why Boundaries Are Important

There are chances that interactions with family do not always go the way you want them to. Sometimes, despite being close to your heart, these people can cause you an endless amount of stress and anxiety. Clearly, that is part of everybody’s lives. However, it would be best to deal with these toxic people once and for all before they could destroy you. Thus, you must recognize that your emotional health is always linked to boundary settings.

Setting healthy boundaries creates a direct influence on your mental and emotional health. It promotes a better feeling of control over the things you like and need, and the ones that make you happy. When you set boundaries, you begin to know who you are. It impacts your perception of how you want others to treat you, and limit the things you want to tolerate. It is your best card when you want clarity and comfort, as boundaries help and protect your emotions.

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However, people can be quite unpredictable. That despite telling them to stop hurting you, some enjoy the idea of you having an emotional and mental breakdown. These people are the ones who want to take control of you. They see you as something useful for a particular reason. Thus, your best thought-out interactions do not often go as effective as the way you want. But boundaries can change that. When you have precise maintenance of restrictions, you can control the situation calmly and more confidently. You will have the chance to protect yourself despite any difficult situation.

You Deserve Better

Usually, you have this mentality that people close to you will never hurt you. But that is a lie. Often, it is the people you love who always put you through a lot of pain. When you place an exemption to the way your family treats you, you will never acknowledge the bad things they do to you. As a result, instead of developing your overall well-being, you allow these people to destroy your inner peace.

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Having people around who provide care and love is different from surrounding yourself with individuals who only know you when they need you. It is essential that you try to distinguish which ones are genuine. Because when you fail to realize that these toxic people are a nuisance in life, you will never achieve serenity and great happiness. That is why you must know you deserve better. You need to understand that you are the master of yourself. Regardless of outside input, you are the only one that recognizes what your heart truly desires. So when you always think positively and often tell yourself that you matter, you will.

Sometimes, some actions often call for assertiveness. That is especially important when members of a family become way too pushy and aggressive. And despite how much you want to take your standards based on the boundaries you think are useful, some will still assault you somehow. That is how things like judgment, ridicule, forcefulness, and contempt take place. These are the ones that become very harmful to your emotional well-being. But it would be best if you didn’t let that shrug you. You deserve respect, and that is where assertiveness comes into play. It doesn’t mean you need to use aggression, though. Instead, it means setting boundaries in saying “NO.”

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Insight

It is natural to have a desire for others to love and understand you. Or at least acknowledge your presence and perspectives. But using that eagerness to be loved and allow yourself to fall into intense self-destruction should become a warning. That is why the boundary setting is a great help in putting things in order. Whether you want to express it is a direct or specific way, it does not matter. As long as your family accepts that you also need the right emotional and mental improvement, it will be okay.

Sometimes, you also need support outside your family . BetterHelp can provide that for you and give you all the emotional and mental support that you need. Check them online for more details.

Ways To Help Your Teen Manage Depression During The Pandemic

COVID-19 is not only affecting people’s physical health, but it is also taking a toll on our mental health. Believe it or not, one of the age groups that are having a difficult time coping with the situation are teens. It’s primarily because they’re getting anxious with the uncertainty of what’s going to happen to them amid the pandemic. At the same time, this is the time that you’re used to having company. Therefore, the lockdown makes them feel isolated and sad. Those negative emotions made them overwhelmed with their dilemma, which led them to depression and tiredness.

As a parent, it might be challenging for you to decide on what approach to take. Take note that with you swooping in does not mean that everything will be okay in an instant. However, there are things that a parent can do to ease what they’re feeling. Here are some of the ways you can help your teen cope with depression.

Be A Supportive Parent

“You might be frustrated that they seem down and irritable a lot of the time and don’t seem to be doing much of anything to help themselves. But if there isn’t much in their life that is making them happy, or something intensely disappointing has happened to them, it’s understandable that they might avoid things they used to enjoy and retreat to their room. Depression makes even doing the smallest things more difficult,” shares Stephanie Dowd, PsyD.

Therefore, your role as a parent is to try to be as empathetic as possible. You can do this by putting yourself in their shoes. Send a message that you are validating their emotion and trying to understand what’s causing their negative emotions. Make sure that you are not there to try to solve the problem. Instead, you are talking to them to give your love and support.

Bring The Possibility Of Treatment

Whenever parents bring up the possibility of treatment, teens react most of the time negatively. The reason behind this is that there is a connotation that treatments are only for those who have uncontrollable and severe conditions. Of course, this is not true.

Therefore, it is your job to patiently explain what it is for, what to expect, and what the possible outcomes are. Once your child understands the ins and outs of the treatment, it will be easier to comply with this strategy. You may even encourage them to make small decisions connected to this, like taking charge of setting up their next session. This way, they’ll feel more in control.

Since face to face might not be the best recourse now due to COVID-19, you may look for alternative medium for treatment. Teletherapy can be your number one option.

Prioritize Physical Health

Keep in mind that physical and mental health will always be connected. If your teen has poor nutrition, inadequate sleep, and inactivity, there is a bigger chance that they’ll feel exhausted and depressed. As a parent, your primary role is to combat these unhealthy habits. You can do this by doing the following:

Limit Screen Time

Children these days often go online to distract themselves and find an escape to what they’re feeling. However, the higher their screen time is, the lower the time they allocate to face time with families and physical activity. At the same time, continually seeing the news about the global pandemic will only give them anxiety.

Encourage Them To Exercise

Always get your teen active since exercise is a critical factor for good mental health. Ideally, children at this age should get approximately 1 hour of physical activity per day. You may even join them so they won’t feel bored and miserable on their own.

Promote 8 To 10 Hours Of Sleep

For their mind and body to function correctly, they need to get at least 8 to 10 hours of sleep. If they don’t engage in this, they’ll most likely be moody and tired for the rest of the day. Those things will burden their mental health.

Cook Balanced And Nutritious Meals

Parents should also make sure that their teens are consuming nutritious food. They need this to boost their mood and reach their optimum brain health. Make sure to prepare meals with fresh produce, healthy fats, quality protein, fruits, and vegetables. Avoid giving them starchy and sugary food since these will only have a negative effect on their energy and mood.

Admit it or not, it can be physically and emotionally exhausting to parent a child with depression. The best way to go about this is to avoid doing the blame game. Instead, make it clear that you are always there for him or her no matter what happens.

You can also tell your teen about BetterHelp. This website offers therapy and counseling services online which is the new normal.

Coping With Anxiety And Depression Amidst The COVID-19 Pandemic

The COVID-19 pandemic has changed people’s lives and caused widespread fear and distress. Especially for people with existing mental health conditions, its impact may be more pronounced than others. They were spiraling in a vicious cycle, which caused them depression and tiredness. Adding to the excessive and persistent worries of people with anxiety disorders experience is the fear of contracting the virus and losing their financial stability. Not only for themselves but also their loved ones.

Appointments with mental health professionals are also being held off due to social distancing and staying at home guidelines. People with anxiety and depression now have to resort to telehealth or teletherapy, where they can connect with their therapists through a virtual medium. If you want to learn the coping strategies for anxiety and depression amidst the ongoing pandemic, there are helpful habits you can do while at home.

Start The Day With Gratitude

The situation the world is in right now can quickly weigh you down. Decide to start your day with gratitude so you will have an improved mood for the entire day. More than what you expect, it can have a significant impact on your mental health.

Although it may be hard, think of something you’re grateful for before stepping out of bed. You can also write gratitude letters to remind yourself of the blessings you have. It can change how your brain functions as you gear towards positive thoughts.

Make A Daily Routine

Due to the pandemic, people with anxiety and depression felt a loss of control in their lives. They can no longer meet their friends regularly, or buy groceries in the way they used to. Establishing routines and schedules can help them regain the consistency they missed.

Children also need a regular schedule to help them feel in control as they are used to the routine in schools. It can help them thrive while performing school activities at home. You can also be more focused on finishing tasks if you have a definite plan. Therefore, a daily routine can give you time for self-care since you can complete your work early.

People with anxiety and depression rely heavily on habits and routines to cope with their intense emotions. It helps them improve their physical, emotional, and mental health, most importantly during stressful times like this.

Distance Yourself From The Media

It’s hard not to worry when news outlets these days are broadcasting the COVID-19 pandemic 24/7. Limiting yourself from the media can prevent you from succumbing to anxiety and catastrophic thoughts. The more fearful and anxious you feel, the more you need to distance from any sort of media.

But yes, you will need to read the news to have updated information on what’s happening to the world. Knowledge is power, after all. You can do this by only reading news from trusted sources. Social media is particularly good at spreading misinformation and lies to gain clicks. Read from websites like the World Health Organization, among others, so that you will perceive health details and less opinionated perspectives.

Take Action

Keeping yourself busy can drive your mind away from thinking worst-case scenarios. According to Ken Goodman, LCSW, “When your mind tries to bait you into worry, don’t take the bait. If you do, like a fish in a lake, you will be caught. Anxiety will try to bait you with many “what if” questions.” So instead of worrying, attempt to solve your problems by finding creative solutions.

It may be uncomfortable, but try to push yourself one step at a time. Lack of confidence in handling challenges is where the anxiety begins. If you have financial problems, you can ask for help, seek out loans, or search online for ways to earn while being in self-isolation. You can also re-sell your things after cleaning your house.

Stay Healthy And Perform Stress Reduction Activities

Eating healthy and regularly exercising affect your mood and emotion. What you put in your body will determine how you think and feel. Proper nutrition is associated with lower levels of anxiety and stress. As most people say, you are what you eat. It also applies to your mental health, not only to your physical health.

Engage with relaxing practices such as guided meditation or yoga. It can give you the peace of mind you need at times like this. Look for sources online to help you in starting.

Having faith that everything shall pass is not an easy thing to do. But when the world is full of ambiguities, you can’t keep your mind in the dark—staying faithful means being a light for other people who need help. Providing aid to others can give you the happiness and control your mind demands right now. Always remember that you’re not alone in this fight. We’re all in this together.

Protected: Grieving Children

My Way Of Coping With Anger And Depression

I have been battling depression and anger issues since I was ten years old. Yes, you read that right. I’ve been depressed and angry since I was very young. You see, my parents neglected me, and as early as six years old, they’ve shipped me to boarding school. I was six years old, and they left me alone to fend for myself.

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It’s Okay to Give Up On Your Partner Who Makes You Feel Depressed

One of the real pleasures in life is being in a committed relationship with a partner whom you can count and rant on, laugh and learn with, give you happiness, care for you, and love you wholeheartedly. A partner like that is hard to come by, and it takes the force of the universe to bring you and your “The One” together.

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Marriage And Depression

Are you feeling exhausted lately? Do you want to keep yourself away from the people in your life? Does it make you feel comfortable if you will only stay inside your room? Is it difficult for you to deal with other individuals? If you answered yes to these, then you are probably going through a depressive state in your life. Take note that depression is not something you can easily claim just because you have experienced all the things mentioned above. It is still highly advisable to see a medical doctor who could give you the exact findings of your mental condition, or if what you have is a mental condition at all.

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What To Say To A Partner With Anxiety

Anxiety is a mental condition that is difficult to handle, especially if you are not the type of person who has a high level of patience or understanding. It can be draining, physically and emotionally, to deal with a person who is always anxious. You will feel exhausted in trying to make the said individual feel good. It is as if no matter what you say or do, she will always have anxieties about certain stuff. If you are experiencing this problem with your wife, then do not fret because you can still do a lot of things about it.

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The 3 Questions You Need To Ask A Therapist

Dealing with depression is never easy. There are many challenges that you need to face before you could successfully get over this mental condition. Take note that once you are diagnosed as clinically depressed, the first thing that you must do is to find the right therapist to help you deal with this matter. It is essential to look for the perfect professional who could motivate you to feel better about the situation. Selecting a therapist to hire is difficult, especially when there are so many individuals qualified for this profession.

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What’s The Connection Between Depression And Psychiatry?

Depression is probably one of the mental conditions that are not understood by many individuals. Unfortunately, there are still people who believe that this mental illness is not a significant issue at all. In fact, some individuals are not even ready to deal with it in the right manner. There are those who merely shrug it off as if it does not affect them at all.

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